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본문

 한가로운 날들이 지나간다. 1년 평가도 냈고, 계획도 내었다.  늘 연말이면 그렇듯...익숙하기만 하구나

 책방에서

 일한지도 벌써 4년이 넘었다. 이곳에서의 시간이 어떻게 흘러갔는지 잘 모르겠다. 어떤 것은 읽다만 소설 속의 어느 시점에서 일까, 멈추어있다. 멈추어 있는 어떤 장면처럼 남아있다라면 좋겠으나 그런 것도 아니어서 되찾아 낼 수도 없다. 어지러운 글자들 속에서 너를 다시 찾는 일이란... 너무 어렵거든.

 책방에서

 매일 같은 시각 같은 차림으로 나타나는 손님들과 마주치다 보면 오늘이 어제인지, 어제가 언제인지, 지금은 오늘인지 잘 모를 때도 있다. 매일이 다를 것 없는 일상 속에서 있다보니 줄지어 있는 헌책들처럼 나도 먼지가 쌓여간다. 오늘은 날 좀 데려가주지... 말하는 것 같다. 그런 널 난 리어커에 싫어보내지만, 넌 또 어디선가 그럴듯하게 또 쌓여있겠지.

 하지만, 난 너와 달리 언젠간 이 곳을 진짜로 떠날 거야. 

 그땐 채프먼의 패스트카를 타고 멀리멀리 떠날 것이야.

Fast Car _ Tracy Chapman

You got a fast car
I want a ticket to anywhere
Maybe we make a deal
Maybe together we can get somewhere

Anyplace is better
Starting from zero got nothing to lose
Maybe we'll make something
But me myself I got nothing to prove

You got a fast car
And I got a plan to get us out of here
I been working at the convenience store
Managed to save just a little bit of money
We won't have to drive too far
Just 'cross the border and into the city
You and I can both get jobs
And finally see what it means to be living

You see my old man's got a problem
He live with the bottle that's the way it is
He says his body's too old for working
I say his body's too young to look like his
My mama went off and left him
She wanted more from life than he could give
I said somebody's got to take care of him
So I quit school and that's what I did

You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so we can fly away
We gotta make a decision
We leave tonight or live and die this way

I remember we were driving driving in your car
The speed so fast I felt like I was drunk
City lights lay out before us
And your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder
And I had a feeling that I belonged
And I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone

You got a fast car
And we go cruising to entertain ourselves
You still ain't got a job
And I work in a market as a checkout girl
I know things will get better
You'll find work and I'll get promoted
We'll move out of the shelter
Buy a big house and live in the suburbs
You got a fast car
And I got a job that pays all our bills
You stay out drinking late at the bar
See more of your friends than you do of your kids
I'd always hoped for better
Thought maybe together you and me would find it
I got no plans I ain't going nowhere
So take your fast car and keep on driving

You got a fast car
But is it fast enough so you can fly away
You gotta make a decision
You leave tonight or live and die this way